Retirement

By now, you may have noticed that I'm not financially savvy. The recent purchase of a PS3 is simply a splash in the ocean of my fiscal indiscretions. *ahem* Flowery language done.

However, I'd like to take the time to thank 2003 Kristen.

Dear 2003 Kristen,

Somehow, you had the foresight to start contributing to a 401K. And while your decision to contribute $100/paycheck was an easy one, where to put that money was not. You went the safe route. The really really stupidly safe route - bonds. As you hawked handbags and then hats, your little nest egg remained little.

And then the third apocalypse of the economy came down upon the many, wiping away retirement funds and stock investments alike. But not yours, 2003 Kristen. Your ineptitude at long-term financial planning gave you a cushion like no other. Your $16,000 bucket got hit by only a .5% reduction as the market plummeted.

I'm not sure how you did it, but cheers.

Yours truly,
2010 Kristen

Seriously - who is that lucky? I've since moved that account to a Hartford LifePath 2040, where the risk is bigger now but peters out over time. I'm averaging a 3% rate of return. While I realize now how much money I could have made investing properly from the beginning, the likelihood of it having been all wiped out anyway was pretty great.

Future Kristen, I've got your back.